Even though I am not working full time I have been very busy! Liz has had two plays she's performing in and I just realized the pictures from one are on my other video card, I'll share later.
Her "absent technically he's her father", father who I will call T sent her money for graduation, quite a lot too. She has not seen the man since she was 6 and he has had all sorts of excuses as why he lost contact. He started writing again the first day of school her freshman year of high school. Out of respect for my husband who has been her dad for 12 years and my own sanity I asked her to not do anything with the relationship until she got out of high school. I remember telling her she could take T to Jerry Springer and figure it out.
I, also told her to let him prove himself, see if he admits to any of his failings.
So with the check came a 5 page letter that could've been written 18 years ago. He blamed me, he blamed his dead ex wife for burning all his stuff including our phone number (don't you think if you were calling your kid you'd know the number by heart??), how everything was basically my fault.
He only figured out my number when he moved to Oklahoma and got the Internet, guess they didn't have Internet before 2000 down south!
The proving never came. He never changed, in years since 1995 he has been married 3 times and had another child.
Can you tell I am pissed, I know how I was when I was with the man. I was no prize, I was a huge pile of problems, I drank too much, I was needy and didn't care who I brought down with me. I did straighten up, I admitted my wrongs and have changed. I claim my part, while the whole relationship with T was wrong (he dated for sport and has been married at least 6 times, me not being one of them either). But I've been blessed with a lovely, wonderful, smart daughter. She is my shining star.
I cannot stomach people who do not see themselves. But as I told my kid he is what he is,no more or less.
Comes to my satisfaction. T did not know that I had set up a court date for child support while Liz is in College. My old order was from 1989 and for very little, I never wanted T to make me send my child to him, as he couldn't be bothered to visit when he lived an hour away .I left things alone. Mark always wanted to adopt Liz, but the fear of the unknown freaked me out. Mark is her father by all rights.
T will be in town this weekend. Liz has plans along with her boyfriend to met him for lunch. So far he has only received one letter from her which basically told him to grow up. Ah such wisdom from a teenager. Wonder if he'll show? I have to keep my hubby and my stepson from going though, they say he has an "ass whipping" coming.
Oh yeah I made sure I had her deposit the check before he got his court papers.
On a lighter note, my niece got married last weekend. It was beautiful.
These are my brothers and I...I am the oldest, Dan the middle, Ken the next down from me and Chris the baby. We were all born with in five years. When my brother danced with my niece I cried, wishing my mother could have been there.
The baby is Rylan, he's getting big.
It's baby birthday weekend. Jacob turned 4 today and Dayton will be a year in a couple of weeks. Liz and I watched the little boys while Tracey had a birthday day with Jacob. He was so excited to not take his brothers along. They went bowling and to Red Robin, which makes a big deal about parties. Their party is Sunday.
My kid & my Dayton. The kid is walking all over the place. More later.