Thursday, September 25, 2008

mrs. h

I can't figure out why this underlined ... It won't undo...::sigh:::

I am sitting here trying to phrase what I want to say...perhaps it's sadness, perhaps frustration, I got word yesterday from my friend J that Mrs H, whom we both work for took a fall and broke her arm.  J and I went to
see her last evening at the hospital and she seems resigned to the fact that this was inevitable.  The fateful day had come when she would no longer be able to live in her apartment.  A nursing home was in her future.  I feel such great sadness not only for those of us girls whom have become her dear friends but for her.  Hiring us was her last grasp of independence.  Now she will have to go into full time care.  She is a woman who has always been independent, a fair yet sometimes stern employer, but always with a sense of humor or a kind word upon my departure each work day. 
Maybe it's us who has to accept it.  Working for her was never about the money.  It was about sharing a friendship with an elder who showed me that getting older was not so bad, that the road ahead was bumpy, but I'd be ok.  Her way was always, always be true to yourself, work hard, don't use dope (a person will sell their mother's eyeballs for dope, her mother used to tell her), and stay happy.  It's hard to be happy today.  My friend is fading away and there is nothing I can do, but understand that this is life.  Her life, Mrs H's way.  She seemed relieved...so for her I will be too.

8 comments:

lifes2odd said...

I'm sorry Rose. She will be in my thoughts and prayers. I have a feeling she will do better than those who love her will along the way. Hugs, Martha

plieck30 said...

Rose you phrased it very well. Friendships come and go and its hard to take when they go sometime but you will always have your memories of her. I had a neighbor like that and I think of her often and her wisdom. Just one thing I remember she always said she wanted a man who could pick up his end of the board. She had been married three times and then married our neighbor who could pick up his end of the board but got cancer so they were only married a short time. Paula

bojgill4375 said...

Isn't it funny how sometimes it is harder for us to accept or rather want for something not to happen to those we love. A stepping stone in our life. I have had several older friends in my life time. Right now one is 91 and her husband is 95. They are both sweethearts. He is not looking very good right now. Maybe you girls will have time to stop by and see her just for a few minutes. Hugs, Janie

suzypwr said...

Both of my parents managed to receive nursing home care in their own homes and never had to go. It can be done, if she has some cash and good insurance. But if she is relieved, then perhaps it's for the best. You can still go visit her, I am sure she would love that.

keepthefaith4117 said...

Honey,I'm sorry about your friend,it is hard when we care about people like you
do and they have to move on.
Hugs
Mickie

queeniemart said...

OH Rose, i am so so so sorry. My heart hurts for you and your friend. So many do not take the time to see the value and love from eldery people...i sure do and always have.....and i know you do too. I am glad you were able to meet her and love her before she had to go into a nursing home and i hope you can go visit often. You are in my thoughts and prayers today. I love you my forever friend.

flossiepumpkin said...

THAT IS MY GREATEST FEAR. NOT HAVING MY INDEPENDENCE ANY LONGER. I THINK I AM GETTING CLOSE TO THAT TIME. MY OLDEST SON BOUGHT ME A ALARM WARNING THING TO WEAR AROUND MY NECK. SOMETIMES I JUST WANT TO PULL IT TIGHT..LOL    ROBERTA

kaydeejay5449 said...

You and Mrs. H are blessed to have each other.  Maybe her arm will heal and she will regain her strength enough that she can go home.  I hope whatever is best for her is what will happen.
Kathy