Happy day

 

 

It was a nice quiet day off.  First I took Liz over to the lady who needed a babysitter.  The little girl is 4 and I think Liz had a good day.  I only called and bugged her at least 5 times!!!  My daughter is very responsible and I know she did a good job.  She is due home in a few minutes. 

Eric came over too, as I called him and made him feel guilty.  He's doing very well too, as he paid me back some of the money he owed me.  Work is going well for him and says he's doing well at school too.  I remember Junior College being not too bad.  He's girlfriend is up there so I am sure she's keeping him in line.  When he and Tim get together they become quite the sarcastic pair.  My kids and their weird senses of humor.  I could tell he and Tim missed each other.  Tim just left a few minutes ago.  For any of you that say it's easy letting go of our your children it's not.  I am at place of acceptance.  I think because of losing so many people I have come to understand letting go.  My boys are out in the world now, and they are doing pretty darn good, if I may say so myself.  But I still miss them!

Tim and I went to the outlet mall, it's an outdoor center and very popular, so it was crowded.  I am not a big shopper.  I remember when I was single and first sober I would go shopping to make myself feel better.  Now I don't need things to feel better, I just ride out the feelings and they pass.

Last night I got stuck on the phone with the brother of the guy Mark used to work with.  In a desperate attempt to keep us from quitting his dead brother's business and therefore leaving this guys wife with no driver he lent us some money.   This was last December when work was very slow the union was taking $1500.00 a month.  We KNEW we could not continue with this business the way things were.  The truck had just broke down again, which cost us nearly $3000.00.  We were at our wits end. We had agreed to pay him when our truck sold.  We never should have gone against our instincts and took this money.  We were ready to work for someone else, but we went against our judgement.  This guy is used to being a bully and I didn't let him bully me.  I told exactly what I thought and said I was sorry for the delay in making payments.  BUT when you have a family they come first.  All this will work out.  I have a God that doesn't care how big the Mountain is.  He is taking care of all of this.  I get up each day and do what I have to be a good person.  My point to all of this is hindsight is one thing, but trusting that God will work everything out is what matters.  We are not bums nor do we not pay our debts.  Life is hard sometimes, but it always works out...it will be interesting to see how God does his work here.  He has already changed me and my Mark.  God bless!  Rose